In retirement, former ALP Prime Minister Gough Whitlam placed a phone call to Cardinal Edward Clancy, AC, at his baronial residence on the shores of eastern suburbs with breath-taking views of the Sydney Opera House and the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

By coincidence, Clancy’s outlook also contained the clearest vision of Kirribilli House, the Australian Prime Minister’s official Sydney residence. As prime minister, Gough preferred his southern seat of Werriwa where he and Margaret’s four children had space to play in the garden.    

There was a note of conspiracy in Gough’s request.  

Was Saint Mary’s Cathedral in College Street – which the Roman Catholic faithful called headquarters – available for a funeral service?

The Cardinal was surprised, nay shocked. He knew Gough to be a militant atheist. Had Labor’s hero decided to convert after all these years of consorting with the enemy?

But Whitlam recognised the Cardinal’s embarrassment and saved the day: ‘No, a Catholic funeral was never for me. I was enquiring about your crypt.  I am willing to pay you in advance, but I hope we can agree on a decent price. After all, I will require it for only three days.’

Can any of my readers name a single Labor MP in the current crop – with the exception perhaps of Tony Burke and Jason Clare – who could handle a situation like this as deftly as the great Gough?